The difference between Democrats and Republicans

I am often asked by my Republican acquaintances to explain the differences between Democrats and Republicans.

While it is possible to spend a college semester discussing the matter, there is a simple answer.

We Democrats are a mixed bunch with a wide range of views and opinions, ranging from the far-out to the middle-of-the-road.  We work out our differences.

Republicans are united with one and only one opinion and the opinion is full-bore, all-out nutty.  Off-the-chart loony.  Bizarre.  Ignorant.  And proud of it.